


7 steps to bagging the art teacher

by blooper_boy



Category: Homestuck
Genre: I am so sorry, M/M, art lessons, fastpuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-28
Updated: 2012-07-28
Packaged: 2017-11-10 23:03:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/471680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blooper_boy/pseuds/blooper_boy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James Egbert is the lucky teacher that gets to teach Human Form 101. Dave Strider is a student in said class. Currently a one-shot, may become muli-part if I ever feel like actually making all seven steps.</p>
            </blockquote>





	7 steps to bagging the art teacher

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FastPuck](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FastPuck/gifts).



“Mister Strider, I thought we’d fixed this last week.” James Egbert sighed and dragged his eyes from Jade, their model of the month, to his most troublesome students canvas. “While you’re use of color has improved dramatically,” the models no longer looked like they were made of red velvet, “You’ve drawn the proportions, off.”   
If he hadn’t known better, he would have said that the boy smirked. “Well maybe if we were trying to paint someone with, different, proportions, I could be a little bit more accurate.” He could feel the boys eyes give him an appraising once over, even if he couldn’t see them. Lord knows he had tried to get David to take off his glasses, but he had smugly whipped out a note from his doctor stating that, “Davids eyes are quite sensitive. He needs to keep his glasses on at all times.”   
The clock chimed and suddenly the entire classes thoughts were only on breaking down their easels. As Jade twirled up the loose fabric that covered her, James cleared his throat to be heard. “I would like three pages of sketches by next class. Try to get as many different angles on sitting as you can. No Roxy, sitting, not sprawling.” He rubbed his temples and quickly sidestepped; avoiding what could have been a very messy situation with someone trying to shove their paint back onto the shelves.   
Of all the classes to get shunted into teaching, he got Introduction to Human Form. True, someone had to teach the basic class, but it was mostly full of people just trying to get their art credits out of the way. By the time his head felt like it was on straight again, the room was empty, save himself and Dave. “Yes Mister Strider?”   
“Well Mister Egbert, like I said, I really think I could get a handle on this faster if I started with someone else. Boobs are impossible to get right, at least on top of everything else, so I was thinking that I might improve more if I tried using a male model.”  
“It may help with basic anatomy.” Anything to get him to draw noses shorter and rears smaller.  
“Can I use you as a model?”  
James stared. This was highly unusual. He taught the class, he didn’t model for it. “There are plenty of boys on campus, why don’t you ask one of the other students.”  
Davids lips pursed slightly. “I was really hoping to start with someone who has a good physique. And the first person I thought of was you. I mean, you’re pretty carved for an old guy. “  
After a quick glance to the schedule posted on the wall, he raised his hands in defeat. “Alright then. I don’t have another class until 4 O’clock, so I suppose you can hang around here and sketch while I do some reading. Mind you, this doesn’t count towards your sketch pages.”  
A smirk again. “That’ll do.” The implied, for now hung heavy in the air. After grabbing a book from his office, James sat down on the box in the middle of the room. David pulled out a notebook and sat back down where he had been painting, tapping his pencil on his leg. “Well?”  
“Hmm?”   
“You need to strip if I’m going to sketch you accurately.”  
James flushed. Agreeing to sit there and let someone draw him was one thing, but he did not pose nude. What if another student came in? They might get the completely wrong idea!  
“I think you can get a start on me with my cloth firmly attached to my body.”   
A small grumble that sounded suspiciously like, “Yaoi hands for you then.” came from David, but apart from that, it seemed the point had been dropped. As he read, James forgot that David was there, until he caught him in the corner of his eye, pushing his glasses to rub his eyes. “Alright, that’s quite enough for now. Too much at once and you’ll hurt your hand.” He plucked the papers from Davids hands, ignoring the squawk of indignity that issued forth.   
“Hey, give those back, they’re still rough!”   
James looked over the page appraisingly. Apart from one that seemed a caricature of him with a small head and huge hands, the page was full of, “Very good sketches Mister Strider. It seems you are capable of drawing human anatomy after all.”  
David snatched back his notebook and stuffed it in his backpack. “Told you. Hey, can we do this again after next class?”  
“Of course.” If he improved this much after an hour, then perhaps the daily practice sessions would be truly useful in making the boys talents shine through. Besides, it wasn’t like he was otherwise occupied.  
“Great.”   
So that was done with then. Easy as pudding. He was just starting to re-arrange the room for his next class when Davids head poked back into the room. “And tomorrow, how about you don’t wear a shirt? If it makes you feel better, I won’t wear one either.” He pulled his glasses down his nose and winked, before his head disappeared again, and James was left there, envisioning a shirtless David Strider.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------------  
Outside the room, Dave pulled out a scrap of paper and crossed off what was labeled   
STEP UNO: CAPTURE TIME WITH TARGET.  
His seven step plan was flawless. The hottest teacher on campus would be his. After a moment of going over the items, he scribbled a note of the bottem.   
STEP 1.5 GET HIM TO STOP CALLING ME MISTER STRIDER

**Author's Note:**

> Well, considering this is the first time I've written Homestuck, not too bad. Critiques welcome, since I have no experience at this at all.


End file.
